The Original Passage
Speed is everything on the way to Mars and not only because a seven-month trip in a confined space can be torturous. The bigger problem is that it can be lethal because of radiation exposure in deep space, where the absence of Earth's magnetic field leaves astronauts far more exposed to deadly cosmic energy than they are orbit or on the way to moon.
The speeding is the important thing on the way to Mars because the distance of the trip in a cramped space could be torturous. The biggest problem is that could be fatal.because of the radiation in the deep space,where the absence of Earth's magnetic field leaves astronauts uncovered and improbability not survive on their way to the moon.(Kluger,2004,p48)..
Speed is everything on the way to Mars and not only because a seven-month trip in a confined space can be torturous. The bigger problem is that it can be lethal because of radiation exposure in deep space, where the absence of Earth's magnetic field leaves astronauts far more exposed to deadly cosmic energy than they are orbit or on the way to moon.
The speeding is the important thing on the way to Mars because the distance of the trip in a cramped space could be torturous. The biggest problem is that could be fatal.because of the radiation in the deep space,where the absence of Earth's magnetic field leaves astronauts uncovered and improbability not survive on their way to the moon.(Kluger,2004,p48)..
Good work, Majeed. Make sure you change the sentence structure of the original. Also, make sure the meaning is the same. There is nothing in the original about how astronauts probably won't survive on the way to the moon.
ReplyDeleteLet me inform you that this passage is not hard to rephrase. This sentence however sounds a little bit not grammatically correct " The biggest problem is that could be fatal." Noun is absent. If you need to reword my essay for free check it with me. I would also recommend to proofread your text.
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